The One Where I Eat So Much I Get A Food Hangover

Hello Chinas!

Last night I went to Chop Chop in Edinburgh's Haymarket - if you haven't been, stop what you're doing immediately and go. It is the BAWS. I was going to take some pictures but then I didn't, because I really didn't want to be the weirdo who takes pictures in a restaurant. So, you'll just have to use your imagination! It's traditional Chinease food, so none of yer deep fried chicken junk that we are so familiar with. No! It's all hand-prepared noodles and homemade dumplings and crispy shredded potato and fluffy rice AND I ate so much that I had to lean against a pole at the train station to try and pull myself together. Total dumpling overdose, fellas, leading to what can only be described as a 'food hangover' upon waking this morning. I'm not sorry though, I would do it again right now.

I love food.

And because of that. I have been GORGING on the new Nigella series. I'm only just at the stage where I can watch Nigella and not yell I LOVE HER I LOVE HER I LOVE HER every time she appears on screen. I love her because she is SAUCY and I think we'd be really good friends. HOW CAN I MAKE THIS HAPPEN? I love the way she's all 'Ooooooh, just reaching up hear for this NAUGHTY SAFFRON!" - sometime I do this for Husband, until he grows weary and asks me to stop. Also, it's not the same when I lick my fingers, rake around in the cupboard, use saucy innuendo like 'oh, this pan is FILTHY *wink*' and then serve up toast. It's not the same at all.


In making news, Chinas, last week I decided to start on my 40's style dress that I talked about in this one. Total nightmare fellas, and I know exactly why. It's a combintation of 1) not knowing how to do it 2) not being patient enough to learn 3) not reading things properly AND 4) wine. So I (sort of) had the bodice finished and was cracking in to the sleeves when I realised I had sewn the sides inside out and the sleeve on the wrong side. So I gave up on that. Also, it doesn't fit me - it's too big around the bust (tee hee), arms, butt and shoulders, and too tight around the waist. Story of my LIFE chaps! And now I not only have to learn how to make it, but also how to adjust it. I might give up on it as an idea.

And to finish, here's a video of the unfriendly cat doing 'Paw and Other Paw'. I think we can agree that the quality is INCREDIBLE. Sorry that it's sideways, I'm not sure why that is the case or what I can do to fix it.  S'laters!

The One With Some Making

Evenin' fellas.

So, you know how sometimes I'm all 'I will FINISH all the things before starting MOAR of the things!' and other times I'm all 'Start moar! Start moar things! Finish none of the things!' Well, just now I'm in the Starty phase, not good at all.

This is me cutting out the pattern for my Collette Macaron dress. I have all the fabric and notions for this, I'm all set. Have I started it? I have not. Why? I dunno. Oh, wait! I DO know! It's because I haven't made a dress yet, and I heard that this was a hard one. So, I released my grasp on the bull's horns. PS. I hate cutting out patterns. I wish I could employ a pattern cutter-outer called Derek or something. Please leave me a comment along the lines of 'You can do it! Just make it! What's the WORST that could happen?!' and then I'll be all 'YES I CAN DO IT NOW!'. Thanks.

Anyway, after completely abandoning THAT I moved on with THIS:

This is a rubbish picture of the pattern I talked about in this fascinatingly exciting post  - how can I fail when I have so many books on dressmaking? How hard could it be?! Answer: quite hard, because I haven't read any of the books. I should like to take a moment's pause here, while you contemplate the fact that I am actually, a qualified Librarian. A qualified Librarian who can't be bothered to read. But I need to be SHOWN, being SHOWN is the key.  I don't have TIME to learn a new skill (I don't know if you can hear the whine in my voice, but let me tell you - it's there), I'm too BUSY with watching Sherlock all the time and looking at FLOOR TILES.

Also, I couldn't upload it on my last post but here's a picture of the display what I made at wurk. I am ludicrously pleased with it, but it did take me A MILLION YEARS:

Aaaaaaaaaarrrggghhhhhhh! Too scary! Try to be brave though. This took me so long to make, I actually lost interest and covered the whole thing in black paper, and wrote 'COMING SOON' in scary, blood-dripping letters until I could be bothered again. I told my boss it was 'to build suspense', and I think he believed me. Tee hee!

Also fellas, Husband and I braved the shops to price more flooring (you might want to take a break at this point to let your heart settle down after all the manic excitement that reading my blog must bring into your life. Brace yourselves lads, it's about to get EXTREME.) Anyway, we had a massive fight (in Ikea, obviously, because no-one has ever left Ikea without having a fight with SOMEBODY) because Husband was all 'Make a decision about the lights in the kitchen!' and I was all 'THESE LIGHTS!' and Husband was all 'I don't like those ones' in a really huffy voice, and I nearly stabbed him with a Helmsblug Potato Peeler. So, we left Ikea sharpish and found ourselves in Next. And here's what happened:

Me: *wanderin' around, looking at stuff, minding my own business* Husband, I've got an itchy bit on my leg that I think might be A HORRIBLE DISEASE......
Woman Next to Me Who is Not Husband: Em......
*massive embarrassed silence*
*woman looks at my leg*
*I miserably look at my leg too*
*woman looks faintly disgusted*
*I nod sadly and am FURIOUS with Husband for wandering away and getting me into this awkward situation*
*woman shudders and walks off*
*I slope away to find Husband, who is standing, awestruck, in the lighting section*
Me: HUSBAND YOU WEREN'T EVEN THE LADY WHO WAS STANDING NEXT TO ME! SHE WAS SOMEBODY DIFFERENT! YOU MADE ME SPEAK TO A STRANGER! THEY MAKE VIDEOS WARNING CHILDREN ABOUT THAT!
Husband: *in a breathless whisper* ...look....
Me: WHA.......oh..........OH!

 OH YES IT'S A LAMP SHAPED LIKE A TELEPHONE BOX AND IT'S MADE OUR HOME COMPLETE! 

The One With No Pictures

I can't upload pictures on the computer I'm using just now, so instead I'll be doing 'complex descriptions' which is probably what they used before pictures were invented anyway and everyone got on ok THEN (note the perfectly logical arguement I've engaged there).

Oh, I have done so many lovely things this week! Last night I went to see Anna Karenina at the flicks and it was...and I don't want to exaggerate here.....THE BEST THING IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WOLRD EVER EVER EVER! I'm not a huge fan of Keira Knightly's work but she was just BORN to play Anna, she's the perfect mix of dutiful wife and RAUNCHY SEXPOT and I now love her with my entire face. Go and see it right now, stop what you're doing, leave work, leave home, go and watch it. Then come back and tell me how much you liked it.

Like I said, no pictures, so here's some instructions so you can conjure a strong mental image of Keira Knightly as Anna Karenina:

*IMAGINE THE MOST PERFECT THING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD*

Oh, this is much easier than I thought it was going to be.

Right, NEXT!

I ordered the Sherlock box-set for me and Husband to watch of an evening. I know I'm so late to this, but is Sherlock not just THE BEST THING YOU'VE EVER SEEN IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE? It's so good, I don't understand why they don't make it illegal not to watch it. Bennedict Cumberbatch IS Sherlock Holmes, he literally IS Sherlock. Martin Freeman IS Dr. Watson. 221B Baker Street is EXACTLY how I want Bumbaleerie Mansions to look. Here's a picture of it:

*Awesome things like a stuffed owl and mismatched chairs and dodgy wallpaper and union jack cushions and glass decanters and books everywhere*

Also, I have ordered a new dress pattern, which is quite funny (funny if you're NOT Husband) because I still haven't ever finished a dress despite having several thousand million patterns. But I couldn't resist this one, I've been looking for a 40s style dress for AGES and I couldn't find one that I liked enough (clothes are getting really dear aren't they? Even in like, ASDA and Tesco and that) and then I 'stumbled' (ebay) upon this magnificent pattern:

*Butterick 40s Style Dress Pattern, which I'm going to make in a Royal Blue colour and maybe white piping, if I can work out how to do that*

Isn't it lovely?

Also, at work I built a giant, open Vampire's mouth for a Halloween Display, try to be brave here:

*picture of scary, open jaws of a Vampire, eeeeeeeeekk!*

How's your week been?